Tori Spelling has opened up about mom-guilt as a single parent and her concern she’s not providing enough stability for her five children.
The actress, 51, who brought her daughters Stella, 16, and Hattie, 13, with her to the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2024 in Los Angeles, spoke about relying on her Stella to help pick up the slack at home on the latest issue of her Misspelling podcast.
Spelling explained she had been ‘working my butt of’ on a project for the last three months, and like many a single mom, has been asking her kids for help around the house.
‘When I’m working and I’m gone all day, it falls a lot on my 16-year-old to really oversee the family,’ she said. ‘I feel really guilty when I come home at the end of the day.’
Spelling shares Stella, Hattie, Liam, 17, Finn, 12 and Beau, seven, with her ex-husband Dean McDermott, 58.
‘People have babysitters or nannies or housekeepers or things like that, but we’re just us — I know that’s probably really hard for the public to understand, but it’s true.’
Tori Spelling, 51, shared concern she’s not providing enough stability for her five children on the latest episode of her Misspelling podcast; seen December 6
Describing her current situation to her guest, Dr. Hillary Goldsher, a psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, the influencer explained, ‘As a parent, financially, work was really stable for quite a long time. I had multiple shows and multiple product lines and brands and just was a workhorse in an empire.’
‘That’s when I had four of my kids and they were able to not see a different side. They were able to have a certain life that I provided for them through work and then all of a sudden, things weren’t stable.’
The Beverly Hills 90210 alum contended that due to the ups and downs on a career in entertainment, her income is ‘not financially consistent, nor is it stable.’
‘With five kids, I feel like I’m sorry. I’m constantly letting them down because my life is not stable. Their lives are not stable,’ she contended.
‘I can give love in abundance, but they’re on this roller coaster with me, unfortunately.’
Spelling said due to the change in her marital and financial circumstances, she’s concerned her kids are ‘privy to more than I think that I’m comfortable with children being privy to, just because we move as a family unit now.’
‘I’m so used to getting such outwardly harsh responses to my life no matter what,’ said the Scary Movie 2 actress.
‘They’re on this journey with me and I can’t keep things from them. I have children that are old enough that they read things online. They read the false stuff, but they read the semi-accurate stuff and they read the true stuff.’
The actress, who brought her daughters Stella, 16, and Hattie, 13, with her to the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2024 in Los Angeles, spoke about relying on Stella ‘to really oversee the family’ while she is at work
Spelling shares Stella, Hattie, Liam, 17, Finn, 12 and Beau, seven, with her ex-husband Dean McDermott, 58
‘With five kids, I feel like… I’m constantly letting them down because my life is not stable. Their lives are not stable’; seen with her kids
‘I can give love in abundance, but they’re on this roller coaster with me, unfortunately,’ said Spelling of her family’s current situation; (Pictured in Los Angeles in September)
‘And I’m not saying poor me — here I am defending myself again — but I feel like since my soon-to-be ex-husband and I separated, it’s been fight or flight.’
‘It’s been constant with five kids,’ the Dancing with the Stars alum continued. ‘And whether it’s emotionally, physically, financially, we’ve just been going.’
‘When life keeps serving you things — unexpected things — on a daily basis, you’re, like, “Oh, I got past that.” And then you have a plan, all of a sudden, boom. And it’s day to day.
‘Divorce is nothing short of a trauma,’ the therapist told Spelling and her listeners.
‘I am not surprised to hear that you’ve experienced — as many women going through divorce do — fight or flight system constantly activated.’
The Mystery Girls star spoke of the Sisyphean challenge of parenthood.
‘I feel like I’m constantly climbing that hill, and I’m almost there, and then something happens,’ she explained.
‘And I know everyone can relate to this on different levels, but it’s like, “Okay. Here I am, made it again on my own” — and boom, slipped back down that hill again.’
About her post-divorce relationship with McDermott, Tori recently told People: ‘We co-parent really well, we’re good friends, and he’s one of my biggest supporters.’
She filed for divorce from the Chopped Canada host on March 29, 2024, citing irreconcilable differences
She filed for divorce from the Chopped Canada host on March 29, 2024, citing irreconcilable differences.
The date of separation was listed as June 17, 2023.
Spelling and McDermott tied the knot in 2006, but the final years of their marriage turned tumultuous, which Dean has taken responsibility for.
‘All Tori’s ever done, to this day, is want me to be happy and healthy and I inflicted a lot of damage and pain on that woman,’ he admitted to DailyMail.com in November 2023.
‘I’m taking accountability for that today. And it’s the biggest amend that I’m ever going to have to make,’ he added.
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