Married At First Sight bride Julia Vogl has broken her silence after her awkward showdown with husband Grayson McIvor left viewers divided.
Speaking to Daily Mail, Julia, 35, insisted she was simply being 'honest and authentic' when she chose emotional connection over physical chemistry - and says she felt unfairly criticised for refusing to rush into the bedroom.
'I think it is really unrealistic to expect me to prance around in lingerie at that point,' she said bluntly.
'We hadn't even kissed. I don't think we should expect women to jump into bed with someone, just because we're married.'
The Melbourne-based bride admitted watching the episode back was 'confronting', particularly the tense argument that unfolded after days of exhaustion and mounting pressure.
'After three nights of sleep deprivation, I was exhausted,' she said.
Married At First Sight bride Julia Vogl has broken her silence after her awkward showdown with husband Grayson McIvor left viewers divided
Speaking to Daily Mail, Julia, 35, insisted she was simply being 'honest and authentic' when she chose emotional connection over physical chemistry - and says she felt unfairly criticised for refusing to rush into the bedroom
'Seeing the argument between Grayson and I definitely took me back to that time, and it was really uncomfortable - especially with someone who I'd just really met.'
While Grayson confessed he felt 'stuck in the friend zone', Julia says there was far more context than what made it to air.
'I'm a 35-year-old woman. I need vulnerability, I need emotional and intellectual stimulation and connection to then move into a physical space,' she explained.
For Fantasy Night, rather than opting for lingerie or seduction, Julia organised a card game designed to spark deeper conversation.
'I really wanted to get to know him better,' she said.
'I actually felt really connected after that. Even the question about his football - he's expressed how important that is to him. That was my way of listening to what's important for him.'
She admitted she 'definitely didn't expect to ruffle his feathers so much with a card game'.
But the fallout left her feeling criticised and unsure how to move forward.
'I think it is really unrealistic to expect me to prance around in lingerie at that point,' she said bluntly. 'We hadn't even kissed. I don't think we should expect women to jump into bed with someone, just because we're married'
The Melbourne-based bride admitted watching the episode back was 'confronting', particularly the tense argument that unfolded after days of exhaustion and mounting pressure
'It was really difficult to feel criticised for my idea of what that night could be,' she said.
'I just wasn't ready for this physical intimacy that he was expecting.'
Despite the tension, Julia made it clear she is physically attracted to Grayson.
'Attraction can definitely grow,' she said.
'I've made it clear all along that I have been very physically attracted to Grayson. But what I was really wanting was more depth and more emotional connection.'
She acknowledged she understood why Grayson felt friend-zoned.
'I definitely understood where he was coming from with that,' she said.
'I think that is honestly where we were at before we could become lovers.'
According to Julia, unresolved conflict made it unrealistic to suddenly pivot into passion.
'It wasn't really conducive to getting sexual,' she added.
One of the most uncomfortable moments came when Grayson pressed her to confirm whether she saw a future with him
Julia admitted it was 'difficult' watching that back, revealing she felt pushed for definitive answers she wasn't ready to give.
'When we're speaking about emotions, he wants black and white answers - and sometimes things aren't black and white,' she said.
'For me, if we could overcome those things, I was seeing a future with him, of course. I wouldn't have been there otherwise.'
She claimed Grayson often struggled to communicate his needs directly.
'Unfortunately, he wasn't able, it seems, to express his needs to me very often, and then I would find out what they were later,' she said.
'I think actually a lot of men struggle with this. They don't know how to express their needs fully. Perhaps then it builds up resentment and it can come out intensely later.'
Julia hinted that much of their tension has not been shown on screen.
'There was a lot of conflict, and unfortunately we're not seeing that properly,' she said.
'So there's a lot of context missing.'
Despite the tension, Julia made it clear she is physically attracted to Grayson. 'Attraction can definitely grow,' she said. 'I've made it clear all along that I have been very physically attracted to Grayson. But what I was really wanting was more depth and more emotional connection'
She also revealed the upcoming dinner party will be one of the most intense nights of the season.
'Strap in,' she warned.
'It was an incredibly intense night. One of the most difficult environments that I've ever been in my life.'
As the Brides continue to splinter into factions, Julia insists she refuses to take sides.
'I'm kind of just on my own team,' she said.
'I don't think it's right to just blindly follow what your friends are saying if you don't think that it's right.'
She added that both she and Grayson were focused on building their relationship rather than fuelling drama.
'I was there to build a connection with my partner. That was my main focus, so I just stayed in that lane.'
Now, as public opinion swirls, Julia says she feels misread.
'I feel like when I watched back [Intimacy Week], I just saw quite an innocent side of me coming in wanting to connect with someone,' she said.
'I feel a little bit misunderstood.'
She insisted she never set out to hurt Grayson.
'I'm definitely not someone who is malicious or intentionally mean,' she said.
'I really gave this my best shot. I was just trying to be true to myself and not do something I didn't want to do.'
Whether emotional depth will eventually lead to passion remains to be seen - but Julia has made one thing clear: she refuses to rush intimacy for the sake of television.
