“Toxic Talk on Abbie Chatfield’s Boyfriend Needs Addressing” – Amanda Goff

Let me be clear: I’m no fan of Abbie Chatfield.

I’m not keen on her boyfriend Adam Hyde either. You know him – that long-haired singer from Peking Duk who seems to be covered in a permanent layer of sweat.

My beef with Abbie doesn’t stem from professional jealousy or our vastly different political views. No, I can’t stand her because she once publicly shared a private message I sent her years ago in which I discussed one of my children, unleashing her self-righteous army of woke followers on me.

Anyone who has followed my life or writing knows my family has always been off-limits – so when she crossed that line, I was ropable.

It was profoundly satisfying then to see Abbie sued for defamation over a similar breach when she posted her former school friend’s DMs to her hundreds of thousands of Instagram followers, and falsely claimed he supported genocide.

She agreed to pay him $79,000 – no small change – so hopefully she’s learned her lesson on that front. 

So trust me when I say this: never in a million years did I think I would be writing a column defending Abbie or her sticky, hairy, Kohl-lined lover. 

But here we are.

Before I do the unthinkable and stand up for Abbie and Adam – who you might also know by his baffling stage name ‘Keli Holiday’ – let me get one thing straight: I find the man utterly insufferable.

Mercifully, I no longer live in Sydney’s east, but my old friends in Bondi tell me ‘he prances around like he owns the place’ and often looks in need of a long shower. 

It’s a theme often repeated online, where Adam has been sucked into the orbit of social media trolling that’s encircled his girlfriend ever since her Bachelor days.

I can relate. My former career made me the target of similar ‘jokes’ that I needed to scrub myself clean. I’ve learned to let it wash over me – pun intended.

But it’s not just his ’70s rock star look that irks me. It’s the shirtless dancing, the glazed, hairy chest seemingly always on display, the smeared eyeliner.

And then there are the OTT declarations of love to Abbie that reached a cringeworthy peak at the ARIA Awards last week. 

‘I really want to thank Abbie, my beautiful Abbie, because without her, this song would not exist at all,’ Adam said as he accepted the award for Best Video for Dancing2 – a song inspired by and dedicated to his headline-magnet girlfriend. 

Later, Abbie told a reporter: ‘We’re going to have a lot of fun after the show.’

Pass the bucket.  

But as lame as it all is, there’s one aspect of the trolling against Abbie and Adam that I simply cannot ignore. It’s stupid, it’s wrong and it’s totally indefensible.

It’s the word ‘cuck’.

The army of incels – ‘involuntary celibates’ – who consider Abbie’s brand of feminism a cancer on society and the reason why women won’t date them have now branded the new Mr Chatfield ‘Peaking Cuck’. How creative.

For the uninitiated, ‘cuck’ in online slang isn’t just a Chaucerian term for a man whose wife cheats. It’s used to mock men who are supposedly weak, submissive or lack control in their relationships.

Trolls aren’t calling Adam a ‘cuck’ because Abbie is unfaithful – she isn’t.

They use the slur because the fact Adam loves Abbie loudly and is coolly unbothered by her sexual past makes these virginal online hate machines seethe.

So they pretend that he’s less of a man for it.

Here’s a reality check from me for these incels angry at the world: you may have no sexual history, but almost every woman alive does.

To sneer at Adam because his girlfriend is honest and unashamed about hers is to insult all women and the men who love them.

For the record, Adam and Abbie don’t seem bothered by the ‘cuck’ slur – they even called it ‘hilarious’ in a recent interview with Pedestrian TV.

But for ordinary men and women, it stings.

It makes women feel ashamed – and for some men, it can plant a toxic seed of doubt in their minds that the person they love may not be ‘worthy’ of marriage because of her past.

In short, it’s a slur that can wreck relationships.

If you don’t believe it, spend 15 minutes on the dark side of the internet where men speak openly about dumping their girlfriends after discovering their ‘body count’.

At its core, the insult suggests: ‘She’s been with other men – she’s damaged goods. He must be pathetic or desperate for dating her.’

To be with a woman who’s been with other men before, in their minds, is on par with being a cuckold. Really, can you think of anything more pathetic than that? 

The term ‘cuck’ is invariably used by men with zero life experience – literal basement dwellers who still cling to a nightclub fumble from years ago because no woman has looked twice at them since.

It’s pure misogyny disguised as banter – and needs to die a death, fast. 

Perhaps the most troubling thing about the word is how the hate-fuelled algorithms of social media giants love it. Linger for more than a few seconds over a post where a man is mocked for being ‘cucked’ and you’ll be served a dozen more.

It’s almost as if they want men to hate women.

Here’s the bottom line – coming from someone who’s no fan of Abbie Chatfield: when a man loves a woman who’s lived, dated and embraced her sexuality, it doesn’t make him weak or pathetic. It proves he’s confident, secure and free of hypocrisy.

It really is as simple as that. 

I mean, imagine if we judged women on the basis of their boyfriends and husbands’ romantic pasts? Most blokes have chapters in their life that are far, far grubbier than the so-called ‘hoe phase’ incels claim renders most women unmarriable.

Abbie is no angel – I think she bullies while hiding behind an amulet of moral superiority. And Adam? He’s a peacocking crooner who makes me physically recoil.

But I won’t accept this insult against them. Adam doesn’t deserve it simply for loving loudly and proudly. No man does.

It’s 2025. This sickening slur is beyond the pale and must stop.

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