James Van Der Beek opened up about his cancer journey as he marked his 48th birthday on Saturday.
The actor, who has been undergoing treatment for stage three colon cancer and encouraging others to get checked for the disease, told his 1.6 million followers the last year, ‘has been the hardest of my life,’ in a video posted on social media.
Labeling the clip ‘What Cancer Taught Me,’ the Dawson’s Creek alum described how coming ‘nose to nose with Death,’ had helped him redefine who he is.
‘When I was younger, I used to define myself as an actor, which was never all that fulfilling, and then I became a husband and it was much better and then I became a father and that was the ultimate,’ he told the camera while sitting in what looked like the family home he shares with his wife, Kimberly and their six children.
He said being away from his family for treatment and living alone in an apartment had forced him to ‘look my own mortality in the eye.’
‘All of those definitions that I cared so deeply about were stripped from me,’ the devoted dad said.
James Van Der Beek opened up about his cancer journey in an emotional video posted on his birthday, March 8 titled ‘What Cancer Taught Me’
‘I was away for treatment, so I could no longer be a husband who was helpful to my wife. I could no longer be a father who could pick up his kids and put them to bed and be there for them. I could not be a provider because I wasn’t working.’
As he was contemplating his identity, the Vampirina voice actor said, ‘I was faced with the question, “If I am just a too-skinny, weak guy, alone in an apartment with cancer, what am I?”
The Downsizing actor said he was meditating on that question, when he got an answer regarding what he considered his diminished status.
‘I am worthy of God’s love simply because I exist. And if I’m worthy of God’s love, shouldn’t I also be worthy of my own?’ he asked.
‘As I move through this healing portal toward recovery, I wanted to share that with you because that revelation that came to me was in no small part to all the prayers and the love that had been directed toward me,’ he said.
The Varsity Blues star then encouraged those watching the video to try to incorporate the message into their own lives, regardless of their beliefs.
‘I certainly don’t claim to know what God is or explain God, my efforts to connect to God are an ongoing process that is a constant unfolding mystery to me,’ he explained.
‘But, if it’s a trigger that feels too religious, you can take the word God out in your mind and it can simply be “I am worthy of love.” Because you are.’
The actor, who shares six children with his wife Kimberly, said the disease had ‘stripped from me’ the ability to be ‘a husband who was helpful to my wife… a father who could pick up his kids and put them to bed’
The Dawson’s Creek star said being away from his family for treatment and living alone in an apartment had forced him to ‘look my own mortality in the eye’
Van Der Beek was diagnosed with stage three colon cancer after undergoing an colonoscopy in August 2023. He did not reveal his diagnosis until November 2014; Pictured in Los Angeles in November 2024
He then thanked his fans for their prayers, and wished them ‘a blessed day.’
The emotional video was greeted with an outpouring of affection for the actor.
‘You’re a gift to this earth and I’m grateful to know you even if it’s just through IG.
‘Greatly admire the graceful way you share and happy you made it around the Sun again,’ wrote former New Kids on the Block singer Joey McIntyre.
Twilight actress Nikki Reed responded, writing, ‘You are such a special soul.
‘You are pure love my friend. Worthy of it all… hoping to hug all of you soon.
‘Happy birthday❤️❤️❤️’
Van Der Beek told his 1.6 million followers the lesson he had learned from his experience was ‘I am worthy of God’s love simply because I exist. And if I’m worthy of God’s love, shouldn’t I also be worthy of my own?’ He encourages his fans to embrace their own self-love
Actress Teresa Palmer revealed, ‘I watched this with[her 11-year-old son] Bodhi with tears in our eyes and Bodhi said “that was really touching” thanks for being love James and sharing that with everyone ❤️’
Colon cancer has been a growing concern in the United States among younger people and is the leading cause of cancer death among those in the 20 to 49 year-old age group, according to the National Institutes of Health.
Van Der Beek said his cancer was discovered after undergoing a colonoscopy in August 2023. He did not reveal his diagnosis until November 2024.
He has not revealed what his treatment regimen has been for the disease, but told People that ‘if you’ve heard about it, I’ve probably touched on it.’
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