Em Rusciano has revealed that being accused of faking her autism and ADHD diagnosis led to depression and paranoia.
The former radio star tells this week’s Stellar Magazine that she was unable to get out of bed as she faced public scrutiny over her admission that she was struggling with the developmental disabilities.
‘It’s such a wild thing to accuse someone of. I took to carrying around my diagnostic report in hardcopy and digital, that’s how upsetting it was. I didn’t get out of bed for a month’ the 45-year-old said.
‘It was my worst fear. It really took me out and down. It made me not want to continue talking about it, but it’s who I am; to shut that part off would be doing 10-year-old Em a disservice, so I spent many months picking myself up.’
She added: ‘And then I got over myself and realised that I don’t need the validation.’
Em Rusciano (pictured) has revealed that being accused of faking her autism and ADHD diagnosis led to depression and paranoia
It comes after media personality Meshel Laurie falsely implied that the comedian was using her condition for ‘clout’.
‘The truth is, I’ve spent a lifetime developing coping techniques to try and fit in, I became an expert at appearing ‘fine’ but in reality my apparent competence was actually heavy duty masking,’ Em wrote online in response.
‘That’s how it is for most late diagnosed women, I now know so many of my mental health issues were because I was trying to force my brain into neuro-typical structures and systems that were not designed for me.’
Em continued: ‘I simply did not understand why life was so bloody exhausting, then I found out it was because I was having to spend all my time pretending that I found certain parts of it easy.
‘It’s such a wild thing to accuse someone of. I took to carrying around my diagnostic report in hardcopy and digital, that’s how upsetting it was. I didn’t get out of bed for a month’ the 45-year-old said
‘I didn’t know that everyone else just knew how to make the right amount of eye contact during a conversation with a stranger.
‘I have great attention to detail because I spend hours anxiously pouring over everything I do in case there is a mistake and someone realises I am not really up to the task.
‘I self monitor in social interactions, I work really hard to not interrupt the person talking, to not take the conversation over and go on a five minute info dumping spree because they’ve mentioned a topic I know all about. When I’m excited or tired or anxious I stim.’
At the time, Em received some unwarranted backlash online after revealing that she had planned to possibly utilise the ‘sensory inclusivity room’ at Marvel Stadium during a Harry Style concert in Melbourne.
‘I’m extremely sensitive to light and sound and textures. Sensory overload and burnout happen to me five or six times a week, that’s why when I saw that Marvel stadium had a sensory room, I was excited,’ she explained after being criticised.
‘It was my worst fear. It really took me out and down. It made me not want to continue talking about it, but it’s who I am; to shut that part off would be doing 10-year-old Em a disservice, so I spent many months picking myself up’ she said
‘These are only a couple of examples of how my ASD shows up, but I shouldn’t have to explain myself. Yet this week I’ve found myself having to endure people debating if I’m autistic enough or even at all. How is that okay?’
The former radio star also called the questions around her autism, ‘limiting and ableist’ and that neurodivergent women, whose symptoms can present slightly differently to those in men, are often left out of the conversation.
‘The only examples of ADHD and autism I had seen were the male presentation. But that’s the whole point, that’s why representation matters. More women like me need to be seen and heard so that we can change the attitudes and narratives around ADHD and ASD,’ she said.
To prove her credibility to naysayers who have questioned her diagnosis and intentions behind publicising it, Rusciano read out her doctor’s assessment during an episode of her podcast.
Breaking down in tears, she said she felt like she needed to carry her report around with her at all times ‘to pull out’ if she’s ever questioned again.
Last year, she explained why her autism and ADHD are more visible since she was formally diagnosed with the developmental disabilities
The star had originally been refused a diagnosis by a male psychiatrist, who felt she didn’t meet the criteria, but she later found a female psychiatrist who was able to assess her.
Rusciano was diagnosed with level one autism in November 2022, just one year after being diagnosed with ADHD (attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder).
Last year, she explained why her autism and ADHD are more visible since she was formally diagnosed with the developmental disabilities.
In a video shared to Instagram Stories, the podcaster says she’s been ‘masking’ her autistic behaviours her whole life and finally feels free to express her true self.
‘If you’re late diagnosed ADHD, autistic, you might come across people saying that all of a sudden, you’re acting more more autistic or you’re acting more ADHD,’ she began in the clip.
It comes after media personality Meshel Laurie falsely implied that the comedian was using her condition for ‘clout’
‘I’m going to give you a reason for that. So our whole lives, there’s been two planes we’ve existed on. What’s actually been going on in our head, and what we’ve been doing with our bodies to mask and fit in,’ Em continued.
‘And that’s what makes us so exhausted and unwell. So when we get this diagnosis, we realise we don’t want to have the two planes. We want our minds and bodies to match up.
‘So we started giving ourselves permission to drop that mask and to close the gap between our body and our head. And that’s why you will all of a sudden start behaving more true to how you’re actually feeling.
‘And you’re actually not putting on an act, you’re actually being more yourself than you’ve ever been in your life,’ the singer concluded.
‘The truth is, I’ve spent a lifetime developing coping techniques to try and fit in, I became an expert at appearing ‘fine’ but in reality my apparent competence was actually heavy duty masking,’ Em wrote online in response
