I think I’ve discovered Tess Crosley’s true agenda after the Lachie Neale scandal. I know you’re reading… if this really is your plan, I promise it won’t end well for you: JANA HOCKING

Unless you were living under a rock this Christmas, you’ll know the scandal of the season was the spectacular breakdown of Jules and Lachie Neale’s marriage.

Like many in the media bubble, I heard the whispers days before the headlines when the split was discussed openly at a lunch packed with high-profile sports figures.

In rooms like that, gossip spreads fast. It was the first time I’d heard the name Tess Crosley. I wonder if she knew she’d become the most talked-about woman in football by the end of the week?

The moment the story broke, she became a cause célèbre.

While I make no specific suggestion of wrongdoing, the fact remains that Jules clearly identified Tess, her former friend, as the woman at the centre of her break-up.

For many women, Tess’s alleged role in the split sent a shiver down their spines. At Christmas parties, somewhere between the prawns and second bottle of champagne, one line was doubtless being whispered in disbelief: ‘…and it was her best friend.’

Since Jules pointed the finger of blame, Tess has stayed silent. With that silence, fascination has filled the void. She has become a figure people feel oddly compelled by – not necessarily because of anything she is alleged to have done, but because her reaction to the scandal has rattled women everywhere.

But first, how did we get here?

At the centre of this sorry tale is Jules, wife of Brisbane Lions star Lachie Neale, who until last week was the club’s back-to-back premiership-winning captain.

She is a successful hairdresser and, by all accounts, a devoted mother. 

In recent weeks, she’s been pushed into the cruellest kind of public reckoning.

First she was subjected to false media spin courtesy of a Herald Sun gossip piece by Jackie Epstein, claiming she and Lachie were ‘working through’ vague marital issues. It was complete nonsense.

Jules acted fast, posting a statement on Instagram that cut through the noise.

‘I want to make it clear that I am not “working through” anything. I have been betrayed in the most unimaginable way. All I can do now is try to heal and do what’s best for my children.’

She also made it clear that Tess was involved in some way, by demanding she remove photos from her Instagram showing the Neales celebrating the Lions’ AFL grand final win alongside Tess and her husband Ben.

‘Take these down, you idiot, you’re embarrassing yourself,’ Jules wrote. 

Now, if you ever happen to find yourself in Tess’s position, there are a few options available. The most obvious – if you’re in the public eye – is to keep a low profile, say nothing and stay off social media. At the very least, you should avoid the perception at all costs that you’re courting the spotlight while another woman’s marriage is in tatters.

But Tess seems to have taken a different approach.

As Jules packed her bags, Tess posted bikini photos. The day before Lachie announced he would stand down as Brisbane’s captain, Tess was smiling at the paparazzi. Meanwhile, she gained 20,000 followers and her Instagram account now has blue-tick verification. Photos remain on her profile of her and Jules together, though she appears to have deleted other pictures, including ones with Lachie.

For me, that’s when the mood shifted.

I’ll be honest – I understand the temptation of seeking validation online. I know what a strategic thirst trap looks like; I’ve posted many of them myself. But timing matters. Her Boxing Day selfies – posted as Jules was likely packing up her marital home and preparing to return to her home state of Western Australia with her children – didn’t feel empowering. Not in the slightest. It felt thoughtless.

On one side, you have Jules trying to piece together the shattered fragments of her life; then there’s Lachie, looking visibly worn, relinquishing leadership of his club while admitting his actions had ‘hurt those closest to me’ yet falling short of a full confession; and then you have Tess, posting on Instagram as if the world isn’t burning around her.

That contrast is what’s made this saga so incendiary.

Which brings me to the part that matters most – my open letter to Tess. Because I suspect you’re reading every word of this.

Dear Tess,

It’s one thing to capitalise on bad press, to make lemonade out of lemons. Plenty do it – just ask the misbehaving brides and grooms of Married At First Sight, who have been doing it shamelessly for years. They understand the window of exposure is brief, and that reputations harden fast if you don’t seize the moment to shift the narrative.

But there is a line.

You might have gained followers. You might even enjoy the thrill of being talked about. But attention earned this way is unstable. It doesn’t turn into real power.

I say this as someone who was a publicist for years and watched scandals up close. True reputational damage happens slowly – after the articles have slowed down and the paps go home. You’ll sense the shift long before anyone says, ‘Remember her?’ And all you’re left with are whispers from other women at your local cafe.

Long after Lachie has retired from football and Jules has moved on, you will brace yourself before meeting new people, knowing that they’ve already talked about you. 

Rightly or wrongly, you will be distrusted by women who don’t know you personally but feel that Jules’s accusations – which you have yet to publicly deny – say it all.

Your name will stay on Google long after the internet moves on to its next obsession.

And yes, it will move on. There will be another scandal. Another woman. Another headline. That’s how this works.

If you want some advice from me, you have only two real options:

Sell your story once, on your own terms, to a current affairs program, then quietly disappear and invest the proceeds. Or say nothing, and let time do its job.

Posting bikini photos with basic captions, seemingly pretending like none of this matters, is not a long-term strategy.

While I suspect there’s a certain logic to your approach – that projecting business-as-usual is your way of refusing to wear the scarlet letter Jules has thrust upon you – the truth is, you’ve misread the room.

Women following this saga don’t see resilience or confidence. They saw that bikini gallery drop into their Instagram feeds the day after Christmas and they bristled.

Social media might reward that kind of move, briefly. Real life rarely does. 

Because attention fades. Scandals expire. But being remembered as the woman who smiled while another family collapsed is a reputation that sticks.

LACHIE AND JULES NEALE SPLIT: READ THE FULL SAGA ON DAILYMAIL+

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